Wednesday 29 April 2009

the entity.

"Suppose I never met you.
Suppose we never fell in love..."

Acceptance.

Man. I look in weird places sometimes. For weird things.

You Moose.

Change. Inevitable really... Funny that it still takes me by surprise sometimes.

I have a gig up north next month.
Roadtrip anyone?!

Man. I love mail. Especially really timely words of wisdom from someone who has NO idea what's going on.

I need a diary. To keep track of dates of stuff.

Burning eyes... I must remember to blink whilst playing guitar hero!

red wine spritzer yes please.
in a mug of course.

So much to do. So little time.

Need more motivation, more inspiration.

I need my capo is what I need. By sunday.

early morning sunday roadtrip with my not-so-little sister.

hey baby i kinda miss your face. come back into my life?!

i love doing puzzles... I need to get better at them though!

Freya's going to Florida tomorrow. Well, today.
I hope she remembers the hawaiin shirt!

What a week.





13Moses told the people, Fear not; stand still (firm, confident, undismayed) and see the salvation of the Lord which He will work for you today. For the Egyptians you have seen today you shall never see again.

14The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace and remain at rest. (Amplified)

14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still. (NIV)

The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm. (NLT)


14 God will fight the battle for you.
And you? You keep your mouths shut! (Message)

14 The LORD will fight for you; you must be quiet (HSCB)

14 You only need to remain calm; the Lord will fight for you. (NCV)
Exodus 14.


I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain.
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here.

All of my life
in every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason worship.
-The Desert Song - Brooke Fraser/Hillsong.



amen.

Wednesday 15 April 2009

story time awareness.

Sometimes people just need to be aware of what they're saying. And how their little "jokes" at other people's expense... can hurt the person at the center of their "funny" little story.
You know?
Especially because we just don't always know what other people are going through... and that little story could just add more little bruises to an already raw heart.
Just throwing it out there.
Cause even if the situation was flip-reversed and you were at the centre of that story... maybe you would find it funny too... But.
just cause you would,
doesn't mean they will...
you know?

Wednesday 8 April 2009

Knowing. And Appreciation Time.

"Sometimes to know who you are, you have to know who you're not."
Freya Blackwell.


Wow.

My mind just got blown.

It fits. So perfectly.

These past couple of days I've been struggling with familiar stuff... that's so unfamiliar....

Familiar because it's just how I always used to live my life.
Unfamiliar because I havn't felt it quite like this is so long.

Um. Wow.

So to learn and figure out who I actually am... I have to just learn who I am not...
repeat of the same thing.
but woah.

Thankyou Freya Blackwell!!!

You are FABUTASTIC!!

I love you. I love that God uses you even when you don't realise... I love that we've been friends since we were 12... or thereabouts.

I love that no matter how much stuff (or how many people) come and go... you are so constant.
Thankyou.
I love that we're so different in so many ways... but just fit.
It's a privilege to have you has my BFF... an honour to call you friend.
And I love when you teach me about horse skelital systems... Next you just need to teach me how to spell it. ha!

You are truly. seriously. definately. a beautiful person... inside and out.

I'm so excited about... lol! um. yeah. All the exciting, scary, fun stuff that's going on right now!

I love the way you make funny things funnier.
Wham Bam Thankyou Ma'am. Tashalicious.
that kind of stuff.

I love the earthquakes you bring into my life also. The good kind obviously.
I also love that we can have whole conversations and be the only people who know what's being said.

You're really good at drawing.

adhfaojfaoiefnkajsgbakojwrnjgbsdkjfhaf??

squiggity squig squigg squiggium squig.


I don't even know if you read this thing very often. But I just wanted to have a little Freya appreciation time...

P.S You have a cute smile m'babe =P

I didn't sneeze.

Sometimes I don't know how to handle when people think they can walk in and out my life as and when they please.

I'm at Helen's house.
What a random day.
Helen and Katie are both asleep... I'm tired but thinking way too much.

I need to sneeze. But Katie is right here.
I don't want to wake her up!

It's ok. Dont worry... I held my nose =P
The sneeze has gone.

You know when you really need to get off the phone but the other person just KEEPS talking?
oh. i think i do that a lot of times to my friends...
oops.

I think i need a good ol' massage. My neck and shoulders are so tense.

I just... I just really always need God. Always.
So much.

I don't try to act all "holier than thou."
i think sometimes it might come across like that...
but I just need my focus to always be on Him.

Not just the parts of life I feel like including Him in.

i NEED God.

like woah.

I just yawned again.
Maybe that means it's time to sleep.

Yes please.

Goodnight.

Monday 6 April 2009

Bed Time.

oh please.
you don't know me. don't act like you know me ;)

you know when you're waiting. you know something's about to happen.
but you don't know what... or when... or how...

Too tired to sleep.
To awake to dream.

Gosh.
Im so happy where I am... yet my heart is in so many far flung corners of the earth... i miss so many people.

It's different to how I thought.

Jesus doesn't hold the key to my heart.
He IS the key to my heart.

Hey you... don't try capitalise on someone else's success...
You're better at being you.
And having your own success.

What's the point in writing notes on my hand? These days I forget to look till it's too late to be reminded anyways.

Eyes finally getting heavy.

A Moth lands on the screen for a brief moment.
Gone.
Back into the darkness.

Photographic Withdrawals.
Book.
A book of photos and words.

Whoops. I just remembered that opportunity that I missed.

Get off your horse and drink some milk.

Grasshopper Green is a comical chap
He lives on the best of fairs.
Bright blue trousers, these are his comical wears....
....It's hoppity skippity high and low summer's the time for fun.

i wish i remembered it.
And I wish I remembered the wise old owl...

The more she spoke the less she heard
The less she spoke the more she heard.

Sunday 5 April 2009

Inside my brain right now?!

Breathe in
Breath out.
Bam. Life.
But it's so much more than just breathing.

Summer is nearly here.
Glorious... That word is just... glorious in itself..

Blue sunglasses. Green grass. Purple flowers.
Red umbrella... wait... umbrella? It's not raining.
It just reminded me of the double rainbow I saw that rainy day in Hamlin...

This week has been Late nights and Pointless movies and Nail Polish... Earthquakes, no rhythm dancing... kebabs and not wham bam thankyou ma'am. that's too much laughing.
and for the record
I'm not guitar hero.

Random dreams make me laugh.
You know when you sometimes can't differentiate between memories and dreams and feelings and realities are blurred and intertwined with a subconscious mesh of a series of random thoughts and pieces of a....
wait... is that all they are? Do dreams mean anything?

My sister is getting ready to go out.

She's so beautiful. And she makes me laugh.

I want to go to Crystal's wedding in Oct.
I think I might just do that.
wait... Is it that easy?
I've been commisioned to write a love song.
Ha.
The most written about subject...
Can I really give a different perspective than one that's been written?!

The guest speaker at church tonight is Australian.
I miss New Zealand.

Next week is Easter.
Oh, Happy Palm Sunday...
I don't want any chocolate next week.

Natasha. Tasha. Tash.
Is there even a difference?

One Voice Can Make A Song.
One Life Can Change The World.

Hard boiled eggs spin.
Uncooked/boiled egg's don't.

I'm going into the studio this week.

It's nearly dinner time.

I'm not ready for skinny jeans.

Next tuesday. Yes please.
I am excited!

Avenue Presents Live Music.
Praiz Factory.

Freedom to dance. Freedom to worship.
No inhibitions.

"Feel the rain on your skin,
no one else can feel it for you."

I wonder how she is doing.

Planning for the future is so full of what if's and maybe not's and argh i don't knows.
But faith can drown all that stuff out.

Ariel is a Mrs!

The rubber duck Richie Rich quacks 3 times... 3 times.

Take a chill pill.

Guard your heart.

Teach me how to guard mine.

It's not enough. It never was.

God is MORE than enough.

I'm happy. I'm content.

22+2+1 bracelets.
uh oh.

but I don't care.

Life is good.
Life is great.
Life is wonderful.

Baby steps.

Well, maybe life itself isn't always great... but Life is.

Friday 3 April 2009

Freedom is as Freedom does.

"Freedom doesn't come from denial. It's is more than a word... It's not a sentence... It is to face, deal with and recognise those behavioural patterns that need changing... and then to change them."

That's a revelation I had yesterday.
If I want freedom... I have to face a reality... I have to embrace it...
Ignoring something's existance doesn't make it go away...

As much as I wish it would...!


Yesterday I had to recognise a truth... And now for all of my todays I have to keep recognising it...
But
my freedom is knowing that I do not have to live under or in it.
The truth is that it is a lie.
And I am no longer bound by it.
If I choose not to be.
I don't understand all of the "why's" about it...
But I don't have to.
I understand that the price of freedom has already been paid...
So I don't need to keep trying to pay.
I couldn't even if I tried...

I will know the truth, and truth alone, shall (and has and will continue to) set me free.