Waiting is...

"Steadfastness, that is holding on;
patience, that is holding back;
expectancy, that is holding the face up;
obedience, that is holding one's self in readiness to go or do;
listening, that is holding quiet and still so as to hear."
S.D. Gordon

Be Encouraged.

I do not claim to know everything... or anything... about you...
I do not claim to know much about your yesterdays... or how they brought you to today.
I do not claim to know any of your dreams... or fears...
I do not claim to know your favourite colour or what you like to do with your spare time.
I do not claim to know your opinions about this or feelings about that...
I do not claim to understand exactly what it is you're going through or why you're going through it.
I do not claim to be able to fix anything.
I do not claim to be your answer.

This is what I claim, this is what I know:

You are a wonderful human being. You are witty. You are NOT a waste of space. You are intelligent. You are vital. You are bold.You are NOT a screw up. You are cherished. You are beautiful and You havn't disgraced anyone. You are accepted, You are loved... Not because of anything in particular you've done, or havn't done... just because of who you are...

Do not live in "shoulda, woulda, coulda."
What's done is done.
You've made mistakes... but honestly, who hasn't!?
What happened happened and yeah... there are consequences...
but too, there is forgiveness and mercy... and justice.

Let truth be the platform that allows you to receive the grace that has your name all over it.

Let hope propel you into your future.

Don't let shame or guilt consume your precious mind and don't let hatred get tangled up in your precious heart.

I encourage you to let this situation that you've found yourself in become a catalyst from negative to positive;
from darkness to light; from pain to freedom...

For what it's worth
I'm proud of you. I'm proud of your courage. I'm proud that you're beginning to face everything that you are afraid of and bring things out into the open. I'm proud that you're not taking the seeming "easy way out..." I'm proud that you're not giving up.

You're stronger than you know.
As you come to see that this season, which may seem to be a hard, unfair, perplexing season...
is such an opportunity for victory; you will also see how much you have grown and changed for good...

Let it be so.

Be encouraged.
You are going to be able to look back on this time and see God's faithfulness and providence.
You will see how He truly is holding your life in the palms of His hands.
You will see that He has not failed or abandoned you...
You will see how He can work every thing into a good thing (Let Him!)

May you truly learn what it is to let joy be your strength.
May you truly be saturated with peace, not heartache.
May you truly know what it is to let God swap the ashes and re clothe you in beauty.

May you dance.
May you laugh.
May you sing.
May you shine.
May you dream.

I'm excited for what your future holds.

p.s it's ok for you to be too!

realignment

I can't begin to describe to you how amazingly hyper and excited and full of joy I have been for the most part of this last week!
God is so good!
Even in the midst of seemingly adverse and ridiculous situations...
I love how constant He is.
I love letting joy be my strength!
I love learning to recognise when my attitudes and perspectives need readjusting... and then seeing and feeling the difference.
I love seeing my prayers answered right before my very eyes!
I love not focusing on my hurts and disappointments and frustrations. I feel so much lighter!
And it's not even that I'm ignoring that I do get hurt and disappointed and frustrated... I do... all of the above!
But... I guess it's just not as big of a deal because I'm learning to just... let God be God. Always. Not my circumstances. I love the difference in people's responses in certain situations depending on my attitude towards them...
Generally I find that when you speak and act with geniune love, its more difficult for them to be angry or rude or hurtful back (most times...)
I love being known and recognised as a source of encouragement.
I prayed that... That I would be known as a source of encouragement and good things... And seriously. I'm not just writing that to big myself up or say how amazing I am lol!
I'm proving the point that the closer I get to God, the more I allow myself to fall in love with Him... the more I give Him permission to use me and work within me, the more I do. And the more He does...
And the more I become like Him.
And the easier it is for me not to focus on the things that irk me about people.
And I find it easier to hear His voice, maybe partly cause my head isn't cluttered with complaints and things that need to change about everything and everyone...(and myself!)

I want everybody to know about God's overwhelming goodness.
I want everybody to know about God's indescribable peace.
I want everybody to know about the inexplicable peace that only God can give.

I also want to put across that I'm very very very aware that life is not perfect.
And that horrible things do happen.
And I am not perfect. I couldn't claim to be if I tried.
I do not handle situations or act/react in effective ways all the time.
I do not always know how to respond to people sometimes...
I am learning.
Always with the learning.
But I love it.

I don't know heaps of theological answers and wouldn't be good at intellectual debates about... anything...
ha.
What I know is what I know. I don't claim to know any more than that.
I know the difference that God has made and is continually making in my life.
I know what it's like to live with Him and I know what it's like to live without Him.
I know which one I prefer.
I know which one hurts less.
And which one makes more sense.

Sometimes I realise that I use a lot of cliche phrases.
I just don't have other words to explain stuff...
I don't want to be a cliche.
I hope I am not.
I just sometimes can't find the right way to put stuff in a way that it hasn't already been said.
I've never been more alive.
I never felt so free.
It's funny to me that the more I know the God, the more I want to know... The more I need to know.

One thing I find hard is how to act in a situation that I'm uncomfortable in though.

I'm so excited about this new season of life that I'm crossing into... I feel like I'm leaving one and entering another.

And it just so happens to coincide with finishing my journal! I've noticed that as a little bit of a recurring pattern, that journals and seasons go hand in hand...

Today I found my prayer for this next season... Well, for the rest of my life really.
But it's so applicable to now.
It's by St. Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not so
much seek to be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
And it is in dying that we are born
to eternal life.