The song, The verse. The revelation, The book.The dinner, The prayer

it's not enough to see you a few times a week
it's not enough to find you occasionally
and there's a lonliness i can't begin to hide
until i have you by my side

it's not enough to tell you without any proof
if i don't live to show you the words i say are true
and there's an emptiness i can't get to subside
until i let you come inside

CHORUS:
i'm giving you my heart
i'm giving you my soul
i'm giving you my love
forever
i'm giving you my world
all i have is yours
i'm giving you my love
forever

it's not enough to give you the pieces of me
if i don't find surrender to be my everything
and there's a passion that i can't begin to hide
when you have made me so alive

That's the song I'm listening to right now... "Forever - Christa Black."

"Let be and be still, and know (recognize and understand) that I am God."

That's what God has been reminding me these last few days... Psalm 46:10. I've heard it SO many times... It's one of those almost cliche verses that can sometimes almost lose it's meaning...
"Let be and be still..."
For me, that's God reminding me to take all my circumstances and feelings and unanswered questions and my constant need to understand why and how things are happening and... just let them be...
I think sometimes it's easy for me to get so caught up in life (and all that comes with it!) that I forget to live.
God's challenging me once again to just "recognize and understand" that He is God! Maybe I even forget what that means sometimes too... That God is God and I am not...
I don't need to always understand why things happen when or why they do... I just have to trust.

–noun

1.	reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

2.	confident expectation of something; hope.

3.	confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods receive

I love that it's a noun too. A naming word. God is trust.

Snow.

That's one of the revelations I had today.
I was stood in the kitchen looking out at the garden (or back yard for you americans =P)
and the snow which fell at the beginning of the week had melted pretty much everywhere... except within the fences of our garden... And the snow was so white. And so deep!
And everywhere except under the trampoline was white. There's a circle of green grass under that. (and No, I have never been on the trampoline...!)
And I was just thinking about how God can cover all of us... except the parts we're covering up ourselves.
I mean, the trampoline has snow too... and if you looked with a birds eye view it would probably look more like the whole garden was covered... but when you are level with it, when you are closer, you can see that even though the snow fell, there is still a part untouched...
I guess it reminded me that if I want God to completely cover me with love, grace... integrity, peace, change... I need to give Him full access to all of me.
God is All Knowing, All Powerful and All Loving... but one thing He will not do is mess with our free will... our choices... therefore to some degree, He can't do what we don't let Him.

Sometimes it's hard to know how.
Sometimes it's hard to know the balance between what we need to do and what we just need to let Him do.

Scarlet Thread - Francine Rivers

That's the book I started and finished today. 4 hours. I couldn't stop reading. I've read it before.... but it was like reading it for the first time.

I'm going to a ball next week. I'm excited. But nervous.
Sometimes I get in the way of Me having fun.
Except it kind of doesn't sound like fun... Getting dressed up isn't something I normally do.
And I hope hope hope nobody tries to make me dance...

Sweet potatoes and salad

That's what's for dinner tonight.

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me.
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from Earth into eternity

That's the song that's on now. And that's my prayer.