Blessings in the Desert Places/Battle Spaces

It's time for a new blog.
I just got that feeling tonight... I'm havn't decided exactly what to write yet though!
I've been sick and in bed for most of 5 days with high fever, back and hip pains, coughing, headaches... blah blah.
I've slept more than I previously thought humanly possible... and thought more than I have in a long time. Some thought processes have been somewhat delusional, but there's been some good stuff in there too...!
I havn't blogged in a while because I guess I havn't known what to say... I've been in a, and maybe still am in, a funk.
Some of it's self inflicted probably.
And I don't really wish to go into details about a lot of it...
But
it's been an interesting couple of weeks... That's for sure!

A lot of stuff within my heart that I wasn't very aware of has been brought to the fore front of my consciousness and knowing how or where or when to deal with things is a battle within itself!
I have so many questions and things I need to find out... Maybe that's part of my female prerogative... but too, I need to find the balance of getting answers to some questions and being ok with never knowing the answers to others... Right now, the second option doesn't make me happy! But such is life...

I love that even in the midst of our desert places/battle spaces God can still bless above and beyond what we even need though!
When I was in Hamlin, NY I was reminded of a desire I'd hidden somewhere deep in my heart to play piano... A dream of mine is to be able to lead worship using a piano... There's just something about it that touches my soul like nothing else!
So I started to play... I would close the door (thus providing a "false sense of security" as Jenessa called it!) and just play... I would ask for help sometimes and sometimes I would just play for probably what was to every one else obnoxious amounts of time!
But even if I'm playing the same thing over and over and over again, I get lost... Time has no effect...
One day maybe in October I was on the phone to my mum in England and asked if we could get a piano, knowing the answer ahead of time would be a big No.
It was.

Within the first few days of being home at the end of the month my mum said to me how the day I'd asked her over the phone about the piano, dad had come home from work saying he'd got a phonecall from an old friend asking if we wanted a piano... And he'd said yes...!

Well, after a lot of phone calls and organisation, yesterday my dad calls up late afternoon asking if we'd cleared a space cause they were on their way over with a piano. When I asked how big of a space, he said "well... it's quite big"
So dad's information to us before this day was only that it would need tuning and that it was an upright.

So the van pulls up outside the house and dad, Levi and a family friend Paul come inside the house to assess the space that mum and I had cleared in the front room...In between my coughing and blowing my nose, I told him the story of the timing of his phone call and he said "You do know it's a grand piano right?!"
um... excuse me?
I told him he was lying.
so they brought the top of it in to prove it, and to find a space.
The space mum and I had cleared would have been more than adaquate for an upright...normal piano... but a grand?! really?
That had always been one of my secret dreams.
We decided it wasn't fair to take up the majority of the living room with a piano so we fixed a space in the study... and the men got to work.
And now in my house there is an old grand piano... I don't even know what date it was made... it looks out of place as anything, it takes up ridiculous amounts of space, its got a few chips... but I love it! It has so much character!
Its just been lying in someones outside shed for a long time so we're waiting for it to adjust (so the keys stop sticking) before getting a someone to come and tune it...
but seriously...
who gets given a grand piano?!